Twas My Blog Before Christmas

by Mark Sierra on December 17, 2007

Twas the night before Christmas and all through the ‘sphere
Me and some bloggers were spreading good cheer.
All the ads were hung in my sidebar with care
In hope that my readers would soon click some there.

I wrote a few posts and scheduled ahead,
Awaited my traffic, while I was in bed.
Next morning I woke to find my stats low.
“What happened?” I cried, “Why didn’t they show?”

When I asked Adsense Tracker for her to help me
She said “Stumble Trolls are the answer, you see?”
So I stumbled and stumbled, then stumbled some more
I searched for one hundred, but only found four.

Scary they were, all angry and wrinkled
Some consumed donuts (some of them sprinkled).
“Can you bring me my traffic, and make it real high?”
I awaited their answer, while swatting a fly.

“Get lost, little blogger, we serve only ourselves.
If it’s help that you want, find some blog elves!”
“Blog Elves” I repeated. Do they really exist?
So I sailed to Kyle’s Cove, to see what I missed.

“No Blog Elves are here,” Kyle said with a grin.
“What you need my good man is a WordPress plugin.”
I scratched my head thinking who else I should ask,
I began to fret over this challenging task.

My adventure it took me to a friend I call “K”
So I stopped at his home page to see what he’d say.
“Glad you asked me, good buddy, I have lots I can mention,
But what you need now is a browser extension.”

I said, “Thank you, friend K, but I have far too many.”
So I sailed and I paid the toll man his penny.
Penny! That’s it! The answer is money!
So I went to the man whose wife calls him “honey”.

Security was tight and the line was quite long.
To close on my goal, I had to stay strong.
When I finally approached his shiny gold throne,
I felt very small, I felt so alone.

“Excuse me, kind sir”, my voice it was squeaky,
“Can you help my young blog?”, I said rather meekly.
The man, he walked toward me, I quickly grew wary.
When he stopped just before me, his name tag read “Garry“.

“Dude, what you need is my frequent reminder.
It’s a very cool tool called Micro Niche Finder.”
And laying a finger aside of his nose,
His jet-pack flared on, up the chimney he rose.

I peered out the window as he floated and flew.
“You need awesome content and Google AdSense, too!”
So I went back to blogging, and wrote this here post,
Not knowing to Google if I would play host.

Would search engines find me? Would people stay here?
Would the Feedburner chicklet go into high gear?
Blogging Gal Tish and some ThingsbyMike
Had blogs that they love, but mine would they like?

Then finally it happened. There arose such a clatter,
I ran to my blog, to see what was the matter.
G’Analytics showed numbers aglow.
I was thrilled and ecstatic. Oh what a show!

Readers left comments, told friends far and wide.
Even Bush stopped to say, “That is quite a tide
Of traffic you have here, my gosh that’s so cool!”
I love it when I have caused others to drool.

But I know that to keep it involves lots of work.
Keep writing good posts and not be a jerk.
So as this year closes, I say to the ‘sphere,
Thanks for your comments and coming back here!

The man on his jet-pack, I could hear flying by,
And as he drew near heard him utter this cry:
“Now Christy, now Bobby, now Colin, and Baron,
On Christine, on Marzie, on Tish and now Aaron!”

These are the bloggers who I travel with most.
And to each I assign this “Twas” Christmas post.
Just copy and paste, and tweak as you like,
Remember to link to others you like.

Merry Christmas everybody!

And for those of you who aren’t tagged, feel free to copy and paste and modify with blogs you like.

Created by MeAndMyDrum.

{ 35 comments }

Christy (45 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 9:48 am

That is the absolute best post I’ve ever read!! I’m laughing so hard I’m crying! And I’m not talking about tearing up, I’m talking about tears streaming…ROFL!

Finally a tag I’ll be happy to do,
a meme that Santa himself might like too,
something fun to post on my blog,
while I get merry on spiked egg nog.

LOL!!!! :mrgreen:

Christy’s last blog post..All Of The Important Stuff!

Bush Mackel (69 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 9:51 am

Wow. *standing ovation* Very well done!

You know Mark, you’re setting the bar pretty high for the rest of us on the creativity scale. (#);D

Bush Mackel’s last blog post..Fixing Up – Bush Mackel (Part 3)

Brown Baron (192 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 10:11 am

I hope that jet pack guy doesn’t whip me :mrgreen:

Very nice work buddy! Let me wipe my tears …

Stumbled.

Brown Baron’s last blog post..Sky Warrior: Time Wasting Shoot’em Up

Mark (844 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 12:04 pm

@Christy
Wow, that’s very kind of you to say. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten a compliment like that before. ;)

@Bush
And thank you for the standing ovation. ;)

@Baron
Yeah, jet-pack guy — he’s one to look out for. :) Thanks for the stumble, buddy!

Carol December 17, 2007 at 12:59 pm

Great !!!

Tish (2 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 4:47 pm

Mark,

Wow. I don’t think I have ever read a better post! You have really outdone yourself here! :) Thanks for the tag! I hope I’ll be able to make you proud!

This is going to to get lots of link love for sure!!

Merry Christmas!

Tish’s last blog post..In Defense of Garry Conn

Kyle Eslick (35 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 5:42 pm

Wow, that is a pretty creative! Creativity like that is one of the reasons I keep visiting! :mrgreen:

Kyle Eslick’s last blog post..MyBlogLog Adds About Me Widget

Andy (1 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 9:42 pm

Absolutely fantastic! How long did it take you to write that?

Andy’s last blog post..What I Found In My Email” Mondays. Vol.1 – Issue 9

Mark (844 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 9:46 pm

@Andy
Thank you! I had been mulling it over in my head for weeks, but when I finally sat down to write it, I guess it turned out to be about 3-4 hours.

Mark (844 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 9:49 pm

Thank you, Carol. :)

Aaron Cook (10 comments.) December 17, 2007 at 11:58 pm

That was awesome man! The best! :mrgreen:

Aaron Cook’s last blog post..Speed Painting – Bumblebee (Transformers)

Mark (844 comments.) December 18, 2007 at 12:08 am

@Aaron
I promised myself I wouldn’t cry… :cry: Thanks man! [sob]

Ad Tracker (15 comments.) December 18, 2007 at 8:37 am

Pure Blogosphere Gold!

I’m sorry it took me so long to ‘discover’ it.

Ad Tracker’s last blog post..Hosting Questions

K-IntheHouse (49 comments.) December 18, 2007 at 10:23 am

Wow Mark! Are you for real dude? This is just outstanding.. what other hidden talents do you have? Blogging, graphics and now this! Stumbled buddy! :shock:

K-IntheHouse’s last blog post..2+1 Ways to Find Secret Amazon Discounts

Andrew (3 comments.) December 18, 2007 at 1:14 pm

Masterfully done! Easily the greatest link love post EVER. Kudos, Mark on an unbelievable job.

Madhur Kapoor (15 comments.) December 18, 2007 at 4:21 pm

Mark, this is absolutely wonderful . Great work . Stumbled

Madhur Kapoor’s last blog post..Links for 16-12-2007

Carol (6 comments.) December 18, 2007 at 9:43 pm

Now This is a really creative and fun to read Post. Mark my friend you have outdone yourself!
Merry Christmas to you and yours :)
Peace.
Carol

Carol’s last blog post..Holiday How-To’s

Mark (844 comments.) December 18, 2007 at 10:21 pm

@Tish
Thank you so much! Woo-hoo!

@Kyle
I’ll keep trying to give you a reason to do that, too. ;)

@Ad Tracker
WOW!! I’m taking a screenshot of that one. :) Thanks so much!

@K
It’s these voices in my head. I figured it’s Christmas and all…better let them out at least once a year. LOL Thank you for the stumble.

@Madhur
That’s very kind of you to say. And thank you for the stumble!

@Carol
Hi! I appreciate you saying so. It was a lot of fun. ;)

betshopboy (9 comments.) December 19, 2007 at 1:57 am

Absolutely brilliant work!

This is poetry in motion, creativity with words at its very best! Definitely stumbled!

You know what, I can hear the sound of engine throttle from the jet pack guy flying past once in a while too! LOL!! :mrgreen:

betshopboy’s last blog post..How To Survive The Holiday Season

Mark (844 comments.) December 19, 2007 at 2:01 am

@betshopboy
Hahaha…thanks for your kind words, buddy! :wink:

Mark (844 comments.) December 20, 2007 at 12:17 am

@Andrew
Thanks so much for the buddy! :)

Tay - Super Blogging (58 comments.) December 20, 2007 at 7:35 pm

Mark, this amazing. I don’t think I’d ever be able to come up with something this good! Stumbled. :grin:

Tay – Super Blogging’s last blog post..Asking The Readers: How Often Should Bloggers Post?

Mark (844 comments.) December 20, 2007 at 8:20 pm

@Tay
That’s very kind of you. Thank you!!

Bobby Revell (41 comments.) December 21, 2007 at 3:16 am

Ever since I read this post the other day I’ve been thinking about how to write something up to par!!! All I can say is you did a fantastic job :smile: I’ll have a tough time with this one. Thanks Mark! Merry Christmas to you and your family :mrgreen:

Bobby Revell’s last blog post..Saturation Point of Blogging

Mark (844 comments.) December 21, 2007 at 7:43 am

@Bobby
Hehe…just have fun with it. :wink: And Merry Christmas to you too, buddy!

:) Suzy (1 comments.) December 21, 2007 at 9:52 pm

Thanks Mark for sharing the “spirit” of pure *FUN*! :razz:

Mark (844 comments.) December 21, 2007 at 9:54 pm

@Suzy
You’re a first-time commenter here. Welcome! And thanks for stopping by. :)

Mike (143 comments.) December 24, 2007 at 10:50 pm

Nice job, buddy! Very clever :mrgreen:

Mike’s last blog post..May your eggnog be plentiful

Mark (844 comments.) December 24, 2007 at 11:00 pm

@Mike
Thank you! :wink:

Sire (4 comments.) December 30, 2007 at 7:33 pm

Mark, that was bloody awesome!

Sire’s last blog post..The Great American Photo Contest

Mark (844 comments.) December 30, 2007 at 8:19 pm

@Sire
Hehe…thanks! It was fun to write. And hope to see you here as a regular reader.

Garry Conn (12 comments.) December 31, 2007 at 11:11 pm

Man that is awesome! Honestly, not doing a spin off, but this is an awesome idea… Blog Poetry! I love it man!! Absolutely love it!!!! Thanks for the mention too. :)

Happy New Year Everyone… 2008 is going to be an awesome year for bloggers! and some poets too!

Garry Conn’s last blog post..Are You In My Network?

Mark (844 comments.) December 31, 2007 at 11:14 pm

@Garry
Well, Mr. Jet Pack Guy, good to see you finally swoop in here. LOL :lol: I’m glad you liked it and thanks for your kind words. And Happy New Year to you too buddy!

silken January 3, 2008 at 9:43 am

great blog post!

Mark (844 comments.) January 3, 2008 at 9:31 pm

@Silken
Thank you much! I enjoyed writing it.

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